Waging war...

My poor beleaguered husband knew what he was getting into.
He was known as "Magical Marc" before he married me because he was so good at identifying a computer's problem and fixing it.
I learned quickly to holler for him when I forgot a password or found that an update has fouled my well-working browser.
It was easier and quicker to get him to fix it than to argue because A. he understands computer ease and B. I try to convince a computer to just go with my plan.
Over the years, I've learned that he has to drive if I want him to fix things and he has learned that I don't want advice, just results.
I still stare at him blankly when he asks me my Apple ID.
What is that? Is it in my book of passwords? Can I make it up on the spot?
It's truly a coming together of two different worlds.
He can't figure out why I don't just know these things like I know my Social Security number and my birth date.
I can't see why I should carry these things around in my head.
I try writing everything down in a little blue book.
Then, when I am asked for a user name/password, I can flip through pages and find it!
The problem is when it's something I can't control by having written it down.
For instance, we are trying to put a local department store on an automatic payment plan.
I missed a payment deadline because this particular store is SO tough to deal with online. I try to go in right after I buy something and it's too soon to pay at the store. Then I forget.
I have tried to pay the bill online but I get into one of these infinity loops where the computer needs your mother's maiden name and refuses to believe you know what it is.
I told the little fellow at customer service I wanted to cancel or get on Autopay. He said I had to do that at home on my computer or on the app on my phone.
That's when I brought in Marc.
He tried to resolve things and after much cussing and gnashing of teeth, he gave up and hauled off to the store. The ladies at the store looked at him sorrowfully and sent him home.
Now, after being "helped by five customer service people," after being locked out for too many tries and now being told a supervisor will call us, we stand defeated.
Our bill says its still unpaid and due.
We can't get into our account. We can't buy any more towels or shoes.
They have our bank account routing number.
Meanwhile, I think Marc is thinking he needs a brighter wife.