Paint truths

After spending the week painting our master bedroom: one color for the walls and another color for the ceiling and yet another color for the trim and doors, I've come to the conclusion that there are certain truths that one ought to simply respect when it comes to painting.

That is, in addition to recognizing that it's always harder than it looks and it always takes longer than you plan.

(I once knew a guy — my in-law in Provo — who painted his entire living room overnight before my son's wedding but he's the exception to the rules.)

Here are Sharon's Top Ten Realities when it comes to painting:

1. It's important to lay down a tarp to protect your furniture and flooring but whatever globs or drips of paint you let fly will fall on the unprotected space outside the tarp.

2. If you wear anything of value while you paint — even for just a minute — you will back into or brush up against a wet wall.

3. If you think you might run out of paint, you will, especially if it's late and the store is closed.

4. The color you choose will always surprise you just a little and maybe a lot. Little paint swatches lie.

5. A dining room chair does not a ladder make, nor does a strong box.

6. If you're in a hurry or you're up against it, the job will take longer.

7. Cheating (or painting without taping first) doesn't pay. You will ALWAYS make a mistake and swipe outside the lines.

8. It ALWAYS take a second coat. There's no getting around it. Just plan on it.

9. The phone will ring just as you pull a fully loaded brush from the can or a dripping roller from the pan.

10. If you missed a spot, you missed more. They'll show up in the morning or after you've cleaned the brushes and put everything away.